There are boundless ways for us to communicate, which should make it very simple for these misunderstandings to never happen in the first place. The cherry on top of all of this, is that this usually happens in a big city, or at least some place bigger than the hometown we grew up in, where excess is welcomed. If you are a single gay man who lives in a large city such as New York City — you have had this happen to you before. I think we are looking for different things: You meet a seemingly great guy either organically at a bar or online.
The conversation is effortless — you share similar tastes and make each other laugh.
Why Is Gay Dating So Difficult? 6 Reasons From an Expert
I believe a revival of courtship is needed in these contemporary times to promote more successful dating practices and provide a structure for relationship development that seems to be lacking nowadays. No one will ever be perfect. We now say things on these platforms that we would never say to another human being in a face-to-face context. Being gay is confusing. Add to the fact that gays often date with the seasons, and half the year is either thought of as warm single, and often slutty season, or as a cold cuddling more relationship based time of the year.
Gay men are beyond picky, and we feel like we can be because with social media the pool of possibilities feels endless. It is not, however an acceptable excuse to not see someone again. No response to a text message ghosting. Yes, not all of us are jealous, or at least to an unhealthy point, but going back to issues of shame and insecurity that stem from our youth, we often have a hard time trusting that we are good enough. If we are lucky enough to meet someone with whom our souls connect in an effortless way, we need to water that relationship because it is rare. Here are some of the reasons I have received for not being asked on a second date: